just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
