Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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