Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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