I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
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