We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
