Fine. I'll sleep in my office
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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