Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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