You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
