im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Randomize
