I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Randomize
