so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
We have started to decorate penises.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
