I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Randomize
