He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
