Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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