69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
