I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize