Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Randomize
