SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
