Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
