I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
