She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
