She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
