I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
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