He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
