Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
