I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
