all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
