My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I smell like Dick and happiness
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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