I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize