hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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