she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I made him laugh his dick is mine
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Randomize