we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize
