the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Randomize
