I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
zippers are such a cool invention
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Randomize
