Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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