i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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