But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
