11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
We talked him into tasing himself.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
