I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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