That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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