whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
