Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
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