Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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