it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
