There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Randomize
