We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I want a musical about memes.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
