Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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