I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
