i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
