I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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